25 July 2013, 8:45am
Tim Gammon recently signed up for an Optus Mobile Phone plan
with 3GB of included data. He never contemplated that he would rack up an
additional $250.00 in excess data charges on his first bill. Tim fell into the
vicious cycle of RedTube and the thrill of the bathroom wank.
A review of Tim’s phone records reveal a 200MB a day porn
habit that lead to the excess charges. Optus was left with no choice but to
disconnect Tim’s phone plan pending payment of his bill.
The Bell Tower Times contacted Tim to hear his side of the
story. He told us that his lowest point was using a payphone on Beaufort Street
to contact his girlfriend:
“I’d wanked myself to the bottom of the food chain, I was forced to use a payphone like a dirty junkie trying to contact his dealer… I recall there being some kind of mucous on the payphone’s headset… I think I may have hepatitis... who the fuck uses a payphone anymore?”.
We asked Tim whether needing to use a payphone was the worst
of it, he told us:
“I didn't want to say, but now that you ask… I've be “revving the engine” to my friend’s Facebook photos… Don’t judge me… You think I’m a grot don’t you?”.
We do.
Haha an all too common occurrence in my life too
ReplyDeleteHahahaha "Revving the Engine"
ReplyDelete