9/10 Men Only Wash Hands If Someone Else Is In Bathroom

26 March 2014, 10:00am

9 out of 10 Men only wash their hands after using the toilet when they beleive they are being watched.

A leading Western Australian University conducted a study into the bathroom hygiene habits of West Aussie men.

The study was aimed at discovering why Gastro was so prevelant amongst West Aussies and to make recomendations to the World Health Council in May 2014.

The results of the study were alarming. The study used heat sensors to determine whether a subject was releiving themselves and then subsequently using the hand washing facilities in a special made bathroom. We are told that the subjects beleived the study was focused on the chemicals found in urine rather than hand-washing frequency. The study found that from a test group of 1000 subjects:

1. 900 men only washed their hands when there was another man in the room.
2. 450 men only pretended to wash their hands when there was another man in the room. 
3. 50 men 100 men consistently washed their hands. 
4. 1 man actively stopped other men from washing their hands (anecdotal evidence).

We asked a researcher what they concluded from the study:

"There is an alarming complaincy in respect to washing hands. I dont think that these men know how quickly disease can spread when hands are not washed. We are baffled by Test subject 55, the man who stopped other people washing their hands. He was a wild brute of a man. He would question the other subjects sexuality if they tried to wash their hands, at one stage he wrestled another subject to the ground to prevent him from washing".

The problems appear only isolated to men. A similar study was conducted with females and it was found that out of the 1000 test subjects, all 1000 washed their hands. In fact, as females go to the bathroom in pairs it was found that they would assist in sensually lathering and washing each others hands. 

The results for the female study as the notepads used by the scientists are a little sticky.