Tomic Headhunted by Perth Glory After Gutless Australian Open Performance

15 January 2014, 8:00am

Bernard Tomic sensationally forfeited after losing the first set to Rafael Nadal in last nights session of the Australian Open.

Tomic complained of a groin injury and was met with a chorus of boo's from the crowd when he walked off the court after the first set.

The majority of tennis fans reacted negatively to Tomic's seemingly gutless effort and the overriding consensus is that he is a quitter - basically, he should have done a "Lleyton Hewitt" and battled through injury to show his true grit. For example, AFL star, "Tex"  Walker tweeted: "Tomic is the most gutless bloke... UnAustralian!! Soft as butter".

Selectors for Australian soccer team, Perth Glory, were however sent into a frenzy after watching Tomic's pissweak, prima donna and heartless performance. A source close to he Perth Glory selectors told The Bell Tower Times:
"Tomic is athletic, European and most importantly, a prissy little piss-worm that would fit into Perth Glory like a glove. The selectors have no doubt that he would overact and dive more than an Olympic swimmer. He is just perfect for the Glory".
We asked our source  if there was anything else going for him:
"oh, the overbearing father is a plus. Perth Glory knows that the father would help the team pressure Tomic into acting the way they need him too - as I said, a piss-worm". 
It is unknown whether Perth Glory has approached Tomic or whether the young tennis brat would be interested in joining the underwhelming team.

One sports embarrassment is another sports wet dream.

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