WA Cops Get Belated Christmas Bonuses - "O'Callaghan Lollybags"

O'Callaghan's Lollybags on display

17 January 2014, 9:30am

WA Police raised an incredible amount of revenue in 2013 - with conservative estimates in the hundreds of millions of dollars. The majority of the revenue was raised through traffic infringements and property confiscated under the proceeds of crime legislation.

The top brass therefore decided to reward their hardworking force by digging into the seized property storage locker and giving out large bags of cannabis and crude firearms (pictured). the gifts have been dubbed "O'Callaghan Lollybags". 

Police we given bonuses that reflected their individual achievements. For example Trust Fund, the top earner, was awarded a staggering 3 ounces of cannabis and a sawn-off shotgun that was seized from a member of an outlaw motorcycle gang. On the flip side, low achieving police were awarded 1 gram bags of O'Callaghan's sons home-baked meth - wildly regarded as powerful yet unstable.

The Bell Tower Times spoke to a young officer who asked to remain anonymous, he told us:

"I reached about 80% of my annual quota for traffic infringements. I was awarded a taser and a box of seized oxycotin. I was really thankful, people think that we destroy all the seized drugs - partly true - me and a couple of hookers destroyed the oxy's in a Crown Casino hotel room ha ha ha. WOOOOO".

Another anonymous officer told us:

" I think the lollybags were pretty unethical. Didn't stop me accepting an ecstasy manufacturing press. It's all a bit of fun and a way to pat us on the back for doing such good traffic cop work".

The bonus scheme reminds us of the unofficial police motto: "Cops who get high with each other are willing to die for each other".

The lollybags have caused anger in the house of parliament. It is alleged that top politicians were only awarded with cheap prostitutes and a signed photo of their patron saint - Craig Thompson .